An Open Letter To My Company’s IT Department

[Note: As a way of dealing with the frustrations of a difficult day made worse by IT bungling, what follows is an attempt at dealing with my irritation through humor.]

To Whom It May Concern:

I don’t know who it was who had the bright idea to push phone system updates through during the middle of the day, but I am hoping the mandatory brain transplant for that employee will be covered by our company’s health insurance plan, once the employee pays for their deductible, of course. For whatever witless person decided that my computer needed to be updated and restarted a second time after I had just logged into it after my belated break while it restarted the first time, I do not know what medical interventions would be necessary to bring such a person into the normal range of human intelligence, but I imagine they would have to be particularly drastic. What urgent and important matter would justify two sudden restarts is beyond me, given that I am an employee whose job duties keep me off of the phone most of the time anyway.

Not only was the timing of this particular restart particularly unfortunate, but the way that the restart was done was highly questionable. There was no warning, at any point prior to the restart, that there would be an update today. There was no e-mail saying that a new update was available, or what issues it was intended to fix or repair, or what time the update would take place. The first hint that such a restart would happen was an ominous message telling me to save all of my files that only had one button—an okay button that would start the restart. As someone whose job requires me to work in massive spreadsheets that require several minutes to save each file, this is unacceptably short notice. When the same lack of notice was given when the system had to restart again after I was beginning the process of recovering all of the files that had been shut down improperly for the update, I felt a letter coming on. And those who know me, in any sphere of my life, know that when I feel a letter coming on the results are usually unpleasant. I would like to compliment you on at least one matter, though, and that is the fact that the timing of your update was impeccable. Had it occurred even five minutes before it would have wrecked the special project I was working on for our mutual boss, namely the President of our company. I’m sure you would have enjoyed explaining to him how a surprise massive computer update delayed an important affiliate contract because it interrupted the reporting process for the client’s due diligence. Am I right?

What we have here is a failure to communicate. So, in the interests of open and honest communication, I would like to communicate the nature of your offenses to me, in the hope that you may repent and amend your behavior accordingly. First, your behavior in forcing nightly restarts of a computer that require daily restoration of reporting settings is sufficiently flagrant that any further restarts during the middle of the day, when I am most busy doing my job, is unacceptable. All updates need to be during the off hours when they will not interfere with the work of my coworkers and I. Furthermore, the nature of any updates requiring a restart need to be communicated openly and in a detailed fashion to those whom it will affect. If an update is sufficiently massive, like moving forward several generations in our phone system, that it requires multiple updates, this needs to be communicated prior to the update being forced. Considering the massive effect your job, whether competently done or not, has on the work that others do, it is of the utmost importance that you recognize that your department is intended to serve the rest of the employees. A servant, however technically proficient, should know his (or her) place and act accordingly, with respect and consideration for those who are being served. To act as if massively important and disruptive universal system updates are a secret black ops mission that cannot be communicated to anyone ahead of time, unless they happen to be skilled at picking up on rumors, is totally unacceptable. Consider yourself informed.

Cordially,

A Concerned User

About nathanalbright

I'm a person with diverse interests who loves to read. If you want to know something about me, just ask.
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14 Responses to An Open Letter To My Company’s IT Department

  1. marlon says:

    Epic!

    Sent from my iPad

    >

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