Though I am a Northerner myself in terms of my own cultural mindset, I come from a family where there is a fairly deep and strong element of Southern culture and worldview.  This sort of dynamic presents itself in unusual ways.  As I was watching House Hunters this evening, with an episode set in Smyrna, Georgia, outside of Atlanta, I was prompted to ponder the endurance within the family shown on that episode and my own family of a particular and revealing aspect of Southern antebellum culture that I thought worthy of exploration.

The most frustrating cultural traits that someone can possess are those traits which lead to strong reactions but come from unknown and obscure sources that one cannot articulate or describe.  Present-day Southerners with strong cultural influence from the antebellum South exhibit many of these traits, but today I would like to focus on the aspect of Southern hospitality that leads a Southern matron to feel great revulsion to having her honored guests enter through any door other than the front door, even if those guests are some Yankee relatives.

In this evening’s episode of House Hunters, a blended Southern family (with a husband, wife, and the husband’s daughter from a previous relationship) was looking at an amazing Arts & Crafts house (one of my favorite styles or architecture) in Smyrna, Georgia.  This house, though, had one glaring quality that both of them kept on referring to–the fact that its driveway was in the back of the house because there was no parking on the front side of the house.  It was awkward for both of them, and they continually wondered if they could get used to the fact that their guests would have to enter through the back door.  It struck me that I would never even think that could possibly be a problem, but also that I have relatives with the precisely identical revulsion to having guests enter through a side or back entrance.

In fact, I will be visiting them in a couple of days for Thanksgiving.  My uncle and aunt live a little south of Atlanta, and both of them have vastly stronger influences from Southern culture than I do.  When I first visited their house, my cousin let us into the side entrance, through the garage and into the dining room, but felt uneasy about it.  Some adroit diplomacy was necessary in order to keep my aunt from feeling as if she had caused offense, but it puzzled me that such a thing would be a problem anyway.

Nonetheless, there is a sensible cultural and historical reason why a Southerner would automatically think to great their guests through the front door.  As it happens, there is the view that front entrances are for guests, peers, those you respect, and the side or rear entrance is for servants and inferiors.  Even without being able to articulate the difference, a true Southerner will often feel a sense of shame if a guest is not greeted in the front door, even if that person is an unconventional Southerner.  That sort of cultural habit and belief, even if not understood or articulated, has lasted for many generations, even if most of the people who show that sort of practice do not understand why they do it.

What sort of lesson does this habit provide?  The power of culture is a very powerful one, and as most cultural habits tend to be unexamined by those who have them, it is hard to explain the reasons and origins of certain habits and behaviors, even though they affect us very powerfully.  Clearly, such a powerful bias towards greeting guests through the front door would lead any genuine Southern builder, especially if the lady of the house had a strong influence in the purchase or construction of the houses, to focus on providing easy and attractive guest access to the front door so that a Southern host or hostess could show off their fine Southern hospitality, even if it’s to an overly inquisitive Yankee like myself.