One of the most profound blessings of my life, and a blessing for which I cannot feel or show enough gratitude, is the high quality of friends I have enjoyed over the course of my life. I hope that I have been just as high quality a friend for other people in their lives as well, providing encouragement and such wisdom as I possess, even despite my chronic struggles with logistical matters. This particular musing was prompted, as is often the case, by discussions with a friend of mine who is particularly anxious about a struggle as well as the loyalty of friends if that struggle ever became known. In seeking to provide encouragement, I came across one of my favorite scriptures, Proverbs 17:17: “A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity.”

In our lives we know times of blessings and times of adversity. All of us prefer to live in times of plenty, enjoying prosperity and gifts, be they material blessings or other less tangible blessings. In times of plenty everyone wants to be our friend, because we have something to offer, be it the reflected glory of success, or the tangible and physical blessings of wealth and power. However, not all of our lives are times of blessing. There are plenty of times where we struggle, we muddle, and where life is not necessarily particularly enjoyable for one reason or another. Sometimes people even intentionally use adversity to test the loyalty of their friends, which I think is a bit uncharitable (and has largely been unnecessary for me, given the frequency of adverse circumstances), as was the case with the playwright Tennessee Williams, who used the adversity of a minor surgery to test which of his friends were loyal enough to wish him well and which were not loyal to him at all.

There are many ways that I feel a certain debt of gratitude to friends. My friends have saved me from the threat of prison, starvation, and homelessness. These are some pretty serious matters, and although I do not like to dwell on the necessity of the support of friends, it is worthwhile to note that at some points in my life it was the loyalty and kindness of friends that has kept me alive. That is a debt that can never be repaid, but it is certainly something for which I am greatly appreciative. I do not know how many others have been in the sort of dire straits that I have, but I am very glad that my friends have helped at times where matters were particularly grim, and where I could provide very little other than effusive gratitude.

There are other, more subtle ways, that friends can provide a great deal of blessing in my life. Although I have quite a few friends, I think that a general idea of the range of how I appreciate the encouragement of friends can be undertaken by an examination of one particular friend of mine who has provided encouragement in a variety of areas. I have known this particular person for about a year, so I have not known this person for a particularly long time. Nevertheless, in a very subtle and pleasant way, this particular friend has encouraged me with such varied matters as setting appropriate boundaries, providing intelligent and thought-provoking conversation about subjects ranging from the novels of Jane Austen to music and education and foreign languages, as well as more specifically encouraging me to coach volleyball (after having seen me play at her house with herself and others) as well as even encouraging me to practice my skills as a deejay. All of this has been done in a very honest and open and kind manner on both sides, which I have greatly appreciated. To have this sort of blessing from fairly new friends, besides the longer chain of blessings from friends that I have had for longer and/or whose counsel I have relied upon for very serious matters, is worthy of praise and I am not remiss in feeling a great deal of gratitude for having such friends of all ages in my life.

I would hope, in light of the appreciation that I have for my friends, that I am as good a friend to others as they are to me. I hope I am able to give them encouragement, provide for their blessings out of the resources and talents and abilities that I have been given, and that I have made their own lives more pleasant and more enjoyable as well as given them opportunities to hone their own abilities through my own assistance. I am not sure that this is the case with every one of my friends, but I hope that at the very least I can provide some wisdom from perspective, a sympathetic ear, as well as thoughtful comments whenever they are most appreciated, even if I do not always have the time to devote to all of my friends in the way that I would like, given the scattered and busy nature of my life. I hope that enough of my appreciation is obvious to my dear friends [1].

[1] See, for example:

https://edgeinducedcohesion.wordpress.com/2013/08/20/i-can-tell-that-we-are-gonna-be-friends/

https://edgeinducedcohesion.wordpress.com/2012/12/29/almost-every-stranger-is-a-potential-friend/

https://edgeinducedcohesion.wordpress.com/2012/12/22/showing-oneself-friendly/

https://edgeinducedcohesion.wordpress.com/2012/09/18/a-friend-in-need-is-a-friend-indeed/

https://edgeinducedcohesion.wordpress.com/2011/06/01/know-thyself-know-thy-friends-know-thine-enemies-know-the-difference/

https://edgeinducedcohesion.wordpress.com/2013/11/10/the-jane-austen-society-of-vancouver-washington/

https://edgeinducedcohesion.wordpress.com/2013/10/10/trust-is-what-im-offering-if-you-trouble-me/

https://edgeinducedcohesion.wordpress.com/2013/10/05/birds-of-a-feather/

https://edgeinducedcohesion.wordpress.com/2013/09/25/living-in-fear-till-nothing-else-remains/

https://edgeinducedcohesion.wordpress.com/2013/09/02/dont-leave-until-they-throw-you-out/

https://edgeinducedcohesion.wordpress.com/2013/08/28/an-embarrassment-of-riches/