Earlier today, while I was looking at my LinkedIn news feed, I saw that someone I knew had liked a post that stated that no two-year old should be disciplined as if they had a fully grown sinful nature. While I have no interest (nor particular expertise) in talking about child rearing as a childless middle-aged bachelor, there is something about this particular statement, and presumably the reason why it was liked, that does not sit well with me and that serves as a straw man for a more substantial debate. I do not think that anyone would claim that a toddler has a fully grown sinful nature or should be punished as an adult, though for that child’s safety he or she should avoid doing crimes in Florida, just to be on the safe side of the law. More seriously, there is disagreement about the extent to which a child’s nature becomes evident over the course of his or her early life, but for the purposes of our discussion it will only be necessary to examine if it is reasonable that a parent would be concerned about the nature of a child that is seen at a young age. I submit that such a thing is reasonable, even if a child’s nature is not full grown at that age.

For the record, it is worth stating that I come from a cultural and religious context where attitude is viewed as being extremely important. Time and time again over the course of my life, I have seen that a great deal can be overcome, but when someone’s attitude is hardened into rebelliousness and opposition to legitimate authority, there is always going to be trouble that results from it. While the Bible says that there is no glory in taking a beating that one deserves with a good attitude, it is a pretty rare approach to dealing with authority in our own time. A lot can be forgiven if someone has the right attitude, but with the wrong attitude life is going to be very, very difficult. And that hard road starts when one is rather young.

As it happens, the person who liked the misleading LinkedIn quote happens to be someone I knew when they were a toddler. As a three year old, this person said that they were sneaky, which was both adorable and somewhat untrue. Yet even though I thought it was endearing that someone would be so guileless while claiming to be full of guile as a small child, it was also something that made me feel a bit uneasy, as the cultivation of an oppositional attitude towards authority can be a major problem in one’s life. How bad of a problem? Think of how it is like to deal with parents when one is a rebellious teen? How does one deal with religious leaders who bring your mistaken beliefs and practices before others with arrogance? How does one deal with police while thinking them to be pigs? It’s not going to go well. Humility and graciousness can cover many flaws, but a bad attitude just makes everything worse.

In this light, it makes perfect sense why it is that parents would be distressed and alarmed at the sight of an oppositional, rebellious, unteachable attitude in a child. Children enter this world with particular personality weaknesses, imperfect upbringings, a terrible surrounding world, and a whole lot of ignorance that must be gotten rid of through education and learning over the course of a lifetime. We all enter this world with a lot going against us and a long way to go before we get anywhere worth being; we need all the teachable attitude we can muster to get to the difficult task of intellectual, emotional, and moral development. Without a good attitude about the process of learning and growing, all we will get is in increasing amounts of trouble, with fewer and fewer people willing to see us as anything other than someone who needs to be beat down and locked up for the well-being of everyone else around. Why wouldn’t a parent want to stop that from happening at the first signs of that kind of problem existing in their offspring?