It is sometimes hard for little creatures realize that they have friends. A dear friend of mine told me a story about how her father moved a nest of a small bird species from on top of their radiator, and after the nest was moved, the family found four little eggs in it. Unfortunately, by the time that the eggs were found, the parents had flown away and abandoned the nest, leaving the four eggs to die without the heat of their parents covering the eggs and nurturing them to growth. And so it is that my dear friend showed me the empty nest with four yellowing small eggs, and presumably the father and mother bird have decided to build a new nest elsewhere and perhaps will lay another set of eggs to raise as winter turns into spring, if it is not already too late to bring a new brood into life.

It can be hard for large creatures to communicate to small creatures that they are no threat. I remember that one time I was a monthly visitor to a family that had an aquarium in their living room, and in the aquarium were some lovely small fish. I was curious to see how the fish behaved, but when I would peer into the aquarium, the little fish inside would hide behind the rocks of the aquarium to feel safe from my presence, while I only meant to observe and understand their ways and not terrify them in any way. Yet my gaze, curious as it was, was terrifying enough for the little creatures, which caused me a great deal of unhappiness. It is hard to communicate friendship to little creatures because one’s size and obvious power carry with it the obvious capability of doing harm, and yet it often comes without the conscious desire to do harm and with the intent to do otherwise, if possible. At the worst, one wants to see and encourage small beings from afar while seeing them and seeking to understand them, and at best one would wish to help them along their way, if that was possible. Yet often it is not.

It is of the utmost importance that beings recognize friends and enemies, and yet it is a difficult task to do so. The traitor is an enemy from within who appears to all outside appearances as a friend, as one of us, yet has a heart that is far from us and that wishes us harm. It can be difficult to separate the traitor from someone who loves us but wants us to be better, and who criticizes some of the choices that we have made and some of the behaviors that we exhibit. Some people cannot distinguish the critic who has some fondness for us and wishes for God to mend every flaw from an enemy who seeks the total destruction of that which they criticize. When we are unable to recognize potential friends, or at least well-wishers, from deadly enemies, we cut ourselves off from people who might have our back and who might at least make our world a less hostile place. Yet this is often done, as people lash out against those they perceive as their enemies and alienate those who are potential friends.

Whether we are small birds, little fish, or human beings, it is not always easy for us to recognize friends and enemies. What is it that makes someone an enemy? An enemy wishes us harm, wishes to see us suffer, to be destroyed or made powerless. Against such people we ought to defend ourselves as vigorously as possible. Yet not all people who stand in opposition to us necessarily want us to be destroyed. Some people might wish to see us converted to their own ways, and if we are particularly decided on maintaining our ways, we may see that as the same thing. We may see acculturation as destruction of our identity and may see those who wish to convert us as wishing to destroy what is distinctive about us, even if such a thing is in fact a wrong thing that ought not to exist in the first place. Other people who oppose us may share our ends but not our means, or may have different limits than we do on what they consider to be the right steps. Sometimes we may have partial agreement in certain areas but disagreement in others. Yet those who are assiduous at collecting enemies may alienate such people and fail to gain the tactical advantages of someone who was on at least some things favorable to us, while recognizing that such “friendship” only goes so far. Whether the tendency to collect enemies comes from unreasonable fears or a lack of practical wisdom and understanding is not always easy to tell, though it is far easier to have compassion on small birds and small fish than on people who ought to know better and who yet do not.