For me, safety and security has been elusive for much of my life. As in so much else in life, there is both an objective reality when it comes to safety as well as a subjective feeling of safety. Where our historical experience of a lack of safety and security has been particularly notable, it is difficult (where not impossible) to feel safe even if time and circumstances have changed. And, as in so much else, we tend to base our behaviors on our feeling of safety and security given our lack of confidence in determining the objective reality of a given situation apart from those feelings and intuitive judgments, however unreliable they may be. Even knowing that our impressions and understanding is unreliable, even knowing that we do not have all of the information we would want or even need to make sound judgments, we often find ourselves compelled to draw lines and make judgments in the hope that despite a lack of information that our gut feelings may at least make our lives safer than making no such judgments at all.

How does one feel safe? Even if we know that given a life where we and others possess free will and will generally screw it up, we also know that unless our life situation is truly horrible that most of the time we are free from violence and persecution even if we are subject to time and chance and evil circumstance. Yet it is not only the big areas of life, but also the little ones, that make us feel unsafe. Even something as mundane as getting unwanted attention or having people close to us that aren’t friendly can make some of us feel unsafe. At times, I have known people for whom deeds of politeness or kindness done by others made them unsafe. Since we cannot know the motives of other people, we will judge others based on our own feelings and perceptions of them. Likewise, since our motives are generally unknown or unrecognized, we will be judged by the perceptions and filters and impressions of others. It is little wonder we should be misjudged often–it is a greater wonder that we are judged kindly and accurately to begin with.

Yet regardless of the sort of world that we live in, there are some places that we should all be safe. For one, we should all feel safe in our homes, especially with regards to our own families. To be sure, we cannot expect our family life to be idyllic–wherever two or more are gathered together there will be disagreements and issues–but we should expect, and demand of ourselves and others, that our homes where people will be safe from ridicule, from taunting, from abuse, from threats and from danger from other family members. Especially as we see the world around us becoming more dangerous, two things become imperative: knowing that our parents, spouses, siblings, and children have our backs, that we have theirs, and that they are looking out for each other as well. Our world is too hazardous for divided houses to be successful. We may not be perfect, but we have to give and receive love and respect closest to home. If we cannot be loved and respected by those who ought to know us best, how can we have the confidence to seek it among strangers who only know us from reputation and much more superficial observation?

Likewise, as we should expect and demand safety and care and respect from our physical, so too should we expect and demand it from our spiritual family. Again, we have to understand that while none of us are perfect, a certain minimum acceptable standard of behavior is that we should be free from abuse, ridicule, and torment from anyone who is named as a brother or sister in Christ. Furthermore, it should not be named among us that we abuse, ridicule, and torment anyone else either. Even further, part of our duties and obligations to present or future members of the body of Christ is to stand up and support and encourage those who are suffering abuse, ridicule, and torment from others. We follow a Lord and Savior who emptied Himself of dignity and glory so that He could rescue us from death and slavery to sin. He did not come to crown others or ourselves so that we could lord it over others or oppress them or take advantage of them or ridicule them or discourage them. It is high time that we should in some fashion emulate the One we claim to follow. After all, a large part of our own safety comes from helping others to be safe and to feel safe as it is possible for us to do so. For as we have done to others, so it will be done to us, whether in this life or in the world to come. Let us so act so that if we await repayment in the future, it is for the concern and love and understanding to others that we have shown to others even where it was not repaid, rather than the fearful expectation of receiving back the abuse and torment that we have heaped upon those who deserved far better treatment as the princes and princesses of the Most High, who will at some point avenge the tears and suffering of His beloved and longsuffering children.